BMW has the M5 that all the guys want to own (well, at least those of us with two testicles that have descended). The BMW M5 comes in a wagon Touring version for around $130,000, but only if you live outside of the United States of America. Why won’t BMW bring the M5 Touring over to the USA? ‘Cause they’re bitches. Continue Reading »

Because of the obvious necessity to have pictures of Sara Jean on this site while still maintaining the Retard BSFW rating, there’s a link on the bottom of this post to download pictures of Sara Jean that are not work-safe. Be sure to tell your friends about Retard Media! Continue Reading »

Tara Guerrero is a model who has more than enough qualifications for me to stalk her with my Kodak (and by Kodak I mean my penis). Of course a model is most appreciated when computer geeks make wallpaper using her image. Continue Reading »

Retarded tour of the web complete with retarded commentary.

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Shu Qi is best known for her Hong Kong career, where she posed for several nude magazines (I’ve never seen magazines that were dressed before) and did some soft core movies. Of course when you need the money, I guess it’s always best to use your best assets. Continue Reading »

There are only a few roles that have been able to accomodate Sela Ward, and since I’ve never heard of the TV show Sisters, that leaves me only The Fugitive to talk about her in. Sela is definitely a star though, you can tell from this photography session that she’s either going to be trying out for a new role or just wants to remember back when she was hot. Continue Reading »

Welcome Sayaka Ando, you are quite a special young lady. In Japan, Sayaka is paid to do anything she’s willing to in a bikini or leotard (ha ha… I said tard). In Japan there are groups of people that are willing to pay hot women to show off their body. Umm… I guess Japan isn’t really unique like that. I’m off to watch the exercise class at the local Y now. Continue Reading »

If you know much about Melissa Schuman you are either a stalker or a teeny-bopper, because Melissa is best known for being in a band called Dream, and that band isn’t touring with Thousand Foot Krutch. The good news is that she’s hot enough to get onto Retard Media! Good for you Melissa, this might be the highpoint in your career so far. Continue Reading »

Retarded tour of the web complete with retarded commentary.

Continue Reading »

The Bundy family wasn’t just something that I wanted my family to be more like, it was what I thought my family could attain with a lot of hard work. I would have gone after my sister because Kelly Bundy was hot, but Laura Bell Bundy has her beat, which means that I now have a new family to idolize. Continue Reading »