Good news fans fan, they finally let me back out and here’s today’s retard tour of the web in pictures with offensive and retarded commentaryisms.

Yep, definitely a British couple (at least they have an honest relationship).

I got finally got Michael his Christmas / Hanukah present (and it’s anatomically correct – I checked).

Screw Tiger I’m staring at the hot chick.

Spandex abuse is a crime or should be a class-B felony.

My neighbors don’t seem to mind my new bathroom (they’re just happy I moved my 83 Fuego off the lawn).
For you non-car people the 1983 Renault Fuego looks like an inbred step-child of the DeLorean from Back to the Future.

That’s me in the background on my last trip to Japan.

That guys not an Apple fan – he’s just keeping track of how many iPods he’s stolen.

I get that reaction from women.

My trip on a boat full of topless hotties on Lake Havasu wasn’t as cool as it sounded like.

My weird uncle Geoff isn’t allowed within 500 feet of a school or Animal Shelter now.

McDonald’s new ad campaign scares the crap out of me.

The little boy I adopted on Feed the Children ten years ago in Thailand turned out weird, but kinda hot looking.

It’s rumored George Lucas is making a situational comedy about Chewbacca and his wacky family next season on ABC.

It’s not as bad as it looks, these guys are on vacation in Mexico and were just having a diarrhea contest.

I am willing to look past her nose and kill anyone it takes to have her and her tasty beverage.

OK this looks bad but those old ladies I walked every day as part of my work release really liked the lake and they both smelled really, really badly.

I figure if she’d hump a railroad I’ve got a shot at her.

Quick someone open the airplane door this flight’s infected with freakie Japanese people.

The twins had twins.

This picture makes me want to hump an Easter basket for some reason.